The Laugh Thread

[JeffH]

Grandpa and Grandma were staying with their son and daughter-in-law. Grandpa noticed that his son had a bottle of Viagra and asked if he could have one.
His son said, "Dad, I don't think you should take one, they're very strong and expensive."
Grandpa said, "I don't care, I want to try one. How much are they?"
His son replied, "$30 each."
Grandpa only had a $50 bill but was going to the bank. He told his son that he would leave $30 under his pillow that night.
The next morning his son found $130 under his pillow and said, "Dad, I told you it was only $30. There's $130 under my pillow!"
Grandpa said, "I know, the $100 is from Grandma!"

[JeffH]

Anthony Fauci is giving the President his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: ''Yesterday, 300 Brazilians died of COVID.'' ''Oh no!'' President Trump exclaims. ''That's terrible!'' His staff are stunned at this uncharacteristic display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands. Finally, Trump looks up and asks: ''How many is a brazillion?''

[Triggersmob]

Anthony Fauci is giving the President his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: ''Yesterday, 300 Brazilians died of COVID.'' ''Oh no!'' President Trump exclaims. ''That's terrible!'' His staff are stunned at this uncharacteristic display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands. Finally, Trump looks up and asks: ''How many is a brazillion?''

That would be funny, if it wasn't so close to the truth.

[JeffH]

Indeed. I told my sister who said" that is a joke, isn't it?". My reply was "Yes, but it could be true."

[JeffH]

The domino effect.

[JeffH]

[Unicorn]

:laugh2: ..... on ya Jeff ..... he looks a bright spark!

[Triggersmob]

Nice one Jeff. As a parts man, that is close to my heart.

[JeffH]

Yes, but can you identify the make and model Steve?

[Triggersmob]

Jeff, my first thought was Ford Escort or Cortina 1.6L,
but there are a lot of caps out there that are very similar.

https://www.scotts-classiccarspares.co.uk/ford-escort-mk3mk4-13-14-16-xr3xr3i-85-90-new-distributor-cap---45170-1573-p.asp

[Pedro]

Not sure the look is going to catch on but each to his own 

Pedro

[nealeffendi]

:laugh2: ..... on ya Jeff ..... he looks a bright spark!

Guy is probably in a silly country with compulsory face covering in public. Genuine masks might not be available or might be expensive. Back at the beginning of March I had a supervisor who told me that with the economic collapse in Lebanon the Leb money was so crap that a genuine mask cost a days income so a relative used a bra cup as a mask (you get 2 masks per bra). Sure beats those using underpants as masks.

[JeffH]

This is a riddle from a Christmas cracker;
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
What is your answer. I have tested this on quite a few people just lately and they are unanimously wrong!

The "correct" answer later.

Whatever the writers of Christmas cracker jokes get paid it is too much.

[Pedro]

I'm guessing the incorrect answer is carrot. Still need to work on the right answer.

Pedro

[JeffH]

Clue. The incorrect answer is topical to these times.