The Laugh Thread

[JeffH]

How many hippies does it take to shingle a roof?

Depends upon how thin you slice them.

[ausjack]

:laugh2: I concede, you win, that's bad

[duggee27]

how do you start a bear race ..

.
.
.
.
.

ready teddy .. go

:laughingneqw::laughingneqw::laughingneqw:

[ausjack]

:laugh2: oh duggee

[JeffH]

Last Sunday morning a Kiwi bloke is walking along Wai Kikamoocow beach when he comes upon a curiously shaped lamp. Picking it up he gives it a rub and out comes a genie!

''I am the genie of the lamp,'' says the genie in a heavy old Persian accent, ''and I can grant you one wish.'' Straight away, the Kiwi bloke says, ''I want to live forever''.

''Can't do that,'' says the Genie, ''it's against genie rules. You'll have to choose again.''

The Kiwi thinks for a moment, then says, ''I want to live until the Wallabies next win the Bledisloe Cup''. The Genie glares, raises his right eyebrow and says, ''Smart bastard, eh?''

[Pedro]

:laugh2:

Pedro

[JeffH]

A not so dumb blonde

A guy gets on a plane and finds himself seated next to a cute blonde chickie babe.
He immediately turns to her and makes his move.
"You know," he says, "I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger. So let's talk."
The blonde, who had just opened her book, closes it slowly and says to the guy, "What would you like to discuss?"
"Oh, I don't know," says the guy. "How about nuclear power?"
"OK," says the blonde. "That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same
stuff - grass. Yet the deer excretes little pellets, the cow turns out a flat patty, and the horse produces muffins of dried poop. Why do you
suppose that is?"
The guy is dumbfounded!! Finally he replies, "I haven't the slightest idea!"
"So tell me," says the blonde, "How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know sh*t?"

[Unicorn]

:laugh2: 10/10 Jeff

[JeffH]

I'm glad you responded Uni. Can you tell me what form unicorn poop takes?

Is this correct?

[Pedro]

Not enough sparkles Jeff - try this one:

http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/unicorn-poop-cookies

Pedro

PS: Just in case you need a little variety here's some more

http://totallythebomb.com/make-unicorn-poop

Unicorn farts look to be a winner!

[JeffH]

So what the hell do unicorns actually eat then?

[Unicorn]

Geez, so close, a combination of both Guys ......

Loosely in the pie with diamonds .......

[ausjack]

I'm glad you responded Uni. Can you tell me what form unicorn poop takes?

Is this correct?

Is there anything the chinese won't fake :angel:

[Pedro]

So what the hell do unicorns actually eat then?

I'm glad you asked Jeff. Here is the answer:

https://justunicorns.wordpress.com/2010/08/08/what-do-unicorns-eat/  :grin:

Pedro

[JeffH]

Oh! And here was me thinking smarties (M&Ms for American unicorns), licorice allsorts and sprinkles washed down with a six pack of assorted food dies. [Trying to figure out cause and effect.]
I bet it (the poop that is) smells just like walking into a sweets shop.
I was also thinking maybe some sort of special grass!